Sunday, May 17, 2020

Ponder - Toilet paper to Treasure

Some Costco employee out there, shout out to you Bro - Chutzpah and all :)

As soon as the Covid19 scare hit the planet, I was kind of contemplating whether or not to jump on the panic band wagon - but whatever they say about 'rub on effect' especially in a crisis situation is true as it can get, and I am sure if there's readership in here during this time, you are probably doing the 'Indian nod' in agreement. So, the panic, slowly and surely hit me as well. As I took a long look at the 'pantry' situation and cogitated deeply about the groceries that need to be replenished to do a starvation free sheltering at place, I realized that I ain't a hoarder. At all. So the daily necessities be it milk or sugar, flour or rice, fruits or veggies were brought in, in short regular intervals and I didn't in the least see a need to buy anything in bulk though the package deals in the US famous warehouse aren't being counted in here. I did have six 2 pound packs of dry pasta, a 20 lb bag of Indian rice and a 20 lb bag of wheat flour to make the Indian flat bread. That's pretty much it if I'd not counted the tubs of tomatoes that were froze from last  year's yield. For the amount of gravies I make, they do come handy though they occupy major real estate in the freezer side of my Sub Zero beauty meets beast of a refrigerator. 

But there are other things that seem to be flying off of the shelves. Toilet paper, sanitizing wipes / sprays and hand sanitizers occupy the top three slots in that order. The last time I bought toilet paper was sometime in December, a time when this virus is kind of visible but the effect it was to take in the coming months isn't.  I somehow did end up having a good supply of it, but not in any monumental proportions the average hoarder today might have - I did have an extra supply as we were expecting house guest in clusters during winter. Thank God for little blessings that amid the scare of having enough food to eat, this having enough to wipe the backside wasn't even an issue. Even if it were, it would have been a 'not such a burning issue' in my 'take life as it comes' philosophy - "toilet paper wasn't ever going to be a thing I'd panic about", I said to myself as I looked at the stark empty corner of the warehouse that housed this endangered item. Suddenly, I felt a slight sink in the gut, like the one you experience when you are being free dropped from a height on a very twisted roller coaster.  The plan B scenarios swarmed above my head - I'll not elucidate all of them here, but yes - When one grows up in the Indian subcontinent where water is supposed to the the holy grail cleanser - one doesn't panic till there's a drought - and drought I hope never hits us like Covid19  managed to hit - and I wish this in all earnestness.

So the trips to grocery stores did happen. I did dress up like a ninja - In head gear, browsing through eerie looking grocery store isles that looked more like whole businesses dressed in Halloween costumes than they looked like grocery stores. I carefully doused my hands and elbows in hand sanitizers that promised to kill 99.9% of the germs and prayed secretly that the .1% is just there for effect and it actually kills 100% of them - actually I said this as an artistic liberty ;) I did have a healthy fear, but wasn't really subscribing to this whole 'mental crisis' thing the pandemic brought along like a Siamese twin. So the dreaded trip to Costco happened as well and I was in the line, distanced by 10 feet from the person before and behind me. As we moved closer to entering the warehouse, a euphoria swept over me, akin to the one someone might experience upon winning the mega million lottery. The second time around, most of the items that were swept clean without evidence during my previous trip, made a contained but prominent appearance. Some items had limits on how many one could buy and rightly so I thought or the late, leisure bird that moi was, moi would be going around with an empty cart and brimming anxiety looking for daily necessities. 

What didn't change at all was the starkness of the toilet paper corner. It was as thread bare as a freshly delivered baby. the price displays telling the only tell tale signs of the existence of Toilet paper in the first place. This time around, my gut didn't do the cartwheel on the roller coaster, instead it thanked its lucky stars that it found the cooking oil I badly needed to keep the food on the dinner table, cooked n all :) But somehow, the supply/demand monster did get to the cool composed me, if not in an obvious way. As rolls dwindled in the household, the cool did too. But I wasn't going to sweat small things. I wasn't. What's the used of being a seasoned, disciplined meditator if it didn't come handy when it had to come handy?? So, the subtle yearning to find toilet paper did persist - though Plan Bs were a plenty.

The next trip was made by the handy husband ( I said handy in the spirit of artistic liberty too. This dude is as handy as a grand piano smack dab in the center of a tight living room where no one ever played the instrument. Enuf said ;)) and I for one thing, made ridiculously meticulous notes about what needed to be bought. So if I had to write Onions I'd write Onions (Red, non sweet ones. Check for mold and rotting ones at the bottom and stay clear) - So you get the idea. The shopping list's first item was toilet paper - it read "Toilet paper, any brand, any count - if it is available. If it isn't don't go around looking for it all over the length and breath of the warehouse like you do when you lose your way and don't want to ask for directions" ) I am sure he gave a chuckle when he read the list or may be he didn't. This dude is the love child of Katrina Kaif (poker faced no matter what the scene and situation demands emotion wise) and Elon Musk - (Ever heard about how his employees have mental issues and he finds it hard to stay married? He is a workaholic brothers and sisters - that's why! :-O

As I head the garage open, I walked out, wondering what all of the necessities made it to the house form the warehouse - and guess what I spot as I help the husband unload the loot! " Costoc's storebrand toilet paper. I in all honesty and zero artistic liberty, felt like meeting J K Rowling in person. It really felt that precious and blessed. I carefully unloaded the bundle onto the garage floor and ran my hands over the plastic having a very gratified moment. That dearies, is what crisis is supposed to put you through. It is supposed to take something as trivial and taken for granted as a toilet paper roll and escalate it to the capacity of a treasure.

Life dearies, is a treasure and so are everything that aid us to live it. Now, all the more, along with the global village, I realize  how interwoven we are and how there's lessons thrown at us so we become better human beings in the rush of living lives. Toilet paper did its job, The figurative one that is ;) - I am more evolved already. I swear. Now get this pandemic out of the way Dear God - Don't be on a time off! Please, pretty, please, with a cherry on top!

:)

 (This is being published in its first draft glory, please condone the typos and spelling atrocities )

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