Monday, April 16, 2018

Day 14 - N for Narration (A fond remembrance)


I met Nessa when she was a baby. A few moths old perhaps, being carried around in a party we hosted for my uncle's 50th surprise birthday. I didn't know her parents personally up until I met them then. Nessa stood out in a crowd with a placidity that was unusual for a child that age. She had an enlightened feel about her. I know it might sound absurd to use enlightened and baby in a sentence, but believe it or not, this was a very special child and I had her specialty unfold in front of me over the next few years.

After that first introduction, I kept bumping into Nessa like it was meant to be. In common parties, at the farmer's market, the mall -  and soon enough, we became quick friends with her wonderful family. A couple years later Nessa and her parents welcomed her brother into this world.

Nessa had it rough. And it is a rough that puts the word rough to shame. She was born with physical impediments that made her a regular at the hospital. She had a congenital heart condition that translated into developmental delays and frailty that was susceptible to fractures. Her iron clad spirit shone through all those ordeals. In the many times I met her, (like I said, she did cross my path more often that I could categorize as chance though it was more often by chance than by plan) I used to trace her tender, dimple indented smile with awe and admiration. Her wide, shiny eyes always had a film of moisture to them while her lips told a story of the gentlest, most happy life one could spot. Her peaches and cream complexion shone with the brightness of her spirit. She is a breathtakingly beautiful soul, the way she handled all the hurdles that were thrown at her.

By eight years of age, Nessa survived major surgeries. We were a part of her celebratory post surgery prayer ceremony in a Gurudwara and Nessa greeted all the guests with her smile that made one wonder if she had won the mega million lottery to be that ecstatic and grinning. My senses used to freeze, looking for unspoken lessons of grit, endurance and peace in her tender disposition. Once when her family had us over for dinner, I spotted Nessa running up and down the carpeted stairs, leaving her shoes by the wooden floor as per instructions of her parents - and she did that every single time she ran upstairs while the other kids of the gathering just did what kids their age were supposed to do when drunk on the excitement of playing and running around in a group. They all, at one time or all times disregarded instructions.

I could sense that Nessa had a special liking for me. She used to communicate more with her smile and used sparing whispers when I engaged her in a conversation. She somehow made me feel like she sensed my awe for her by being nice to me, it felt as if she had a mystic ability to feel my love and a magical empathy that she graced upon me by acknowledging my love for her with that warmth she radiated.

Nessa passed on from her mortal form shortly after her tenth birthday, after surviving many surgeries to her heart and brain with the smile of a saint. Her frail form succumbed to a nasty fall. The morning I walked into their home to meet her parents after her passing, I was greeted by a photograph of hers taken on her tenth birthday with a Princess entertainer. She had the same gentle, enlightened smile lighting up her tender face, outshining the perpetual film of moisture that lined her eyes. Later her mom told me that she was mighty inspired after attending a princess party I hosted for my child  and wished to have one for herself on her tenth birthday. I couldn't cry when Nessa passed. Cause she taught me differently. In her few years she spent among us, I was always fascinated and enamored by the strength of her smile. A smile that cut through severe infliction of physical and perhaps a bigger emotional pain. I had heard of stories where she had pacified her parents in their tears, enduring all she did during her visit to earth. Nessa came to the world with a lot of purpose. And showing me how to live life was one of them.

Thank you Nessa darling, for existing. For smiling. For somehow bringing into my life a lesson that would have been left unlearned and  left me a little meaningless if I had not met you.

Pic credit - Chaithanya Kanni

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