Day 7 - (G) - God, Give me!

Glittering stars in my sky,
Great friends that standby!
 Gleeful days, good and bright!
Gorgeous nature in my sight!
Giant belief that you shall stay
Guiding me by night and day!
 Generous blessings, sent my way,
Gentle breeze, genuine smiles,
Glorious paths, golden hearts,
 Gurgling streams to quench my thirst!
Greener pastures all along,
Gifts of giving, sharing, caring!
 Gems galore of lofty thoughts!
 Grab my hand, hug me tight!
 Glow your light in days of plight!

Day 6 - F for forgiving, forgetting.

As a child, I used to be endlessly charmed by the daily prayer we said in our school assembly, that was addressed to Our Father in heaven - which said, "And forgive us our sins - as we forgive those who hurt us, Oh, Forgive us our sins! When I heard those lines, it stuck to my immature, evolving sense of right and wrong that "Forgiving" is more divine than anything else in the world. And then I grew up. I saw a fair share of forgivers, non forgivers. I saw vengeful behavior that was pretty understandable. But more often than not, being vengeful is a two edged sword - when you seek revenge, you also inflict a part of that hurt on you. There are people who lead enemy centered lives, changing their course based more on how it would effect the enemy than it would effect them. I recently read a quote which said - "By forgiving, I give up my right to hate the person who had hurt me." But the point is, what would we achieve by hating? May be solace, may be just a satisfaction that we're undoing the damage done to us. I had to reply to the message saying "Forgiving saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred and the waste of energy" - it is not an original quote but one that I'd read as a child and I'd held on for a long time. I did cross paths with people who I despised. I probably led an enemy centered life for a few days - trying to do things based on what the other person was doing. I nurtured the hatred with a steady supply of negative emotions, anger and loathe. But then it dawned upon me that when we let it go, we are free in a whole new sense of the word free.

A few years ago, I'd followed a news that shook the nation - a gunman that entered a school and shot innocent children in a Parish community. I was moved to no end to read that Parish folks that interpret the bible literally, the very parents who'd lost their children to this mindless, senseless act of a suicidal gunman, actually forgave him and attended his funeral on the side of their own off springs. Now, this is an exemplary event - something that most of us would not have the courage or will to do. But on a smaller scale, there are things that people do to us - cheating, lying, robbing etc. These acts seed in us the same negativity that they are born from. It is very tempting to retaliate to an insult and I think it is human nature. But when we make that retaliation the center of our universe, we miss out majorly on enjoying the better things in life. Yes, it is a prerogative of the wronged to avenge for it - but it becomes a parody when our own instinct to avenge for it poisons us from within to a point where we become mentally equal to the ones that wrong us. When you love someone, you house them in your heart and when you hate someone, you house them in your mind. In your mind that lets you discriminate from good to bad, the one that distinguishes us from other species in the world. Forgiving is an enormous feat, divine - easier said than done - but blessed are the ones who, forgive, forget and move on with the positives in life.

Day 5 - E for emotions.

Emotions enter,
Each one engulfing
Exciting, excruciating,
Empty and Envious,
Evolving, encompassing
Eccentric, endearing.
Emotions capturing
Eternal souls.
Entourage of emotions
Enduring, enlightening,
Elegantly etched,
Enormously felt
Enigmatic, energetic,
Embarrassed, ecstatic.
Enjoy them, enthrall in them
Eschewing the bad
Embracing the good.

Day 4 - D Dreams

Dreams, dancing daintily,
On Drooping eyelids,
Dreams, like destiny,
Dangling divinely
Divulging destiny.
Dreams
Like destinations dim
Decorated with dazzle
Defining Delight.
Dreams, dear dreams
Delightful, Dramatic
Disclosing Desire.
Dead Dreams
Dragging on Dungeons
Dark and Deep!
Dreams decked,
Devotedly delusional
Daring to defend
Delicate dilemmas.
Delightful, deceitful,
Drawing lines
Draping danger,
Down they land
Dwelling
On windows to the soul.

(Day 3) C - Confession

My dearest Girl in the pink scarf -
Call it stupid, or just plain cuckoo - but from the moment I set my eyes on you - I am lost in a world of my own. I seem to think about you all the time, tangled in the fringe of your pink linen scarf. When you were walking on the side walk, with the leash held daintily in your hand - I for once, wanted to be the poodle - that cute, cuddly poodle of yours. I wonder what name you fancied for him! But to me he looked like Luke - Don't ask me why he did look like Luke and not like Buddy or Max. I followed you all along, trying to not make it too obvious that I was stalking you - Kind of!
Geez - I did actually stalk you? Shame on me. Only the other day, I proclaimed to my gang of friends that I am my own person and can never fall in love. Lo and behold, I find myself - like I said - tangled in that lush fringe of the pink scarf - appliqued with white organza flowers. By God, you have got some taste. The baby pink of the fabric brought out the same robust, healthy hue in your cheeks - making me wonder if the scarf added beauty to you, or you did to the scarf.
You are quiet a fashionista though - I thought of myself as a rock star with the Medusa tattoo and the piercing on my right eye brow - but I just wonder how you achieved that look of yours without piercing any needles into your epidermis. You'd rewritten a couple of things for me - Style and then my own destiny that was not too long ago, written in bold italics the way my maverick mind deemed fit.
And then again, in all the nineteen long years I'd walked on this Earth, and breathed its air, I never ever dreamed that this day would dawn upon me - sneaking in on me like a reality slap. All the guys that hovered around their girl friends made me sick to a point where I wondered why mating is so over rated - and then the magic happened - as much shallow as the concept of 'Love at first sight' seemed - I feel I am a victim of it. And I am not complaining.
If you find this confession any sincere or any serious, I would be much honored if you meet me at the coffee shop. I shall show up in my ragged jeans and the Medusa tattoo on my right arm showing - I hope you do not have a pet aversion to piercings and also hope that you think of me as much a rock star as I think of myself. I promise to you though - that you'll not regret it if you chose to give me a chance.
Please wear the pink scarf when you come to meet me - I just need to untangle myself off of it - or wait a minute - may be I'd love to be tangled there - always and for ever.
Hope to see you soon.
Much Love
The Boy with the tattoo, piercings and electric blue hair :-)

B (day 2) Blooms

A

Aspirations align in the ally,
Achievements await ahead.
Allure of ambitions,
Accelerating to reach the acme
Almighty awakening,
Aiming to attain !
Abstract adventures,
Attack in ambiguity.
Altruistic attitude,
Absolute affirmations
All walking away
Alighting with aplomb
Adorning the abyss
Appealing to the Alternate,
Aimless arousal -
Artlessly arranged!

Companion

Through thick and thin,
You were friends with me,
Imparting your wisdom
To help me lead my life.
Through sorrows and joys,
I held you in my hands -
Always engrossed
Into what you were unfolding before me.
Through rain and shine,
I settled down with you
In the cozy nook of my home
While sipping herbal tea
Or Coke zero!
Through childhood and adulthood
You shared your stories with me
Once about princesses and demons
Once about rags to riches tales
And once again,
About "once upon a time" fantasies.
You never failed me -
You measured up
As a friend, philosopher, guide -
My precious companion
Once hard bound, once a paper back
Or just a inexpensive print
On recycled paper.
Your many forms adorn my shelves
And most importantly, my grey cells! :-)

Puzzler - 2

The door opens with an awkward creek while the harsh florescent light from the corridor seeps into the dark room. He walks in to fumble on the side of the wall to find the light - he takes time to locate it. The room bathes in the softly lit desk lamps on either side of the bed. He walks in and places his bags on one side of the room.

"Ananda, come in." He calls out softly. Her head still reeling from the rush of events, her eyes hiding the welling up tears of helplessness. She walks into the room in a trance and settles on one side of the bed. He could not say anything to keep her from sobbing. He lets her wash out her emotions for a good five minutes, walks to her, places his hand on her back and rubs it gently.
"It is all going to be fine" He assures her though he doesn't know how it is going to be fine when she looks like she'd lost everything she had on the way to the hotel.

He opens up his bottle of water and offers her a drink. She gulps it down wiping her tears. She takes a few minutes settling her emotions down while he looks at her nonchalantly, not knowing what to do, not knowing how to take her pain away.

"Is there anything you want to share with me?" he asks her softly. "I can talk, I can listen, I can - I can" he searches for words to comfort her.
She lifts her head, looks him in the eye and smiles. He doesn't ask any more questions.
She suddenly realizes that she is stuck in this room with a perfect stranger, for the whole night. What choice did she have anyway? Her mind travels from one bizarre thought to anoter.
'I hope you are comfortable sharing the room with me" He asks her.
She nods her head in agreement. "I hope you are comfortable sharing the room with me" She says in return, flashing a mischievous smile. "I am a little scared, but I think I shall manage" He plays along.

She gets up to freshen up and he lets out a sigh of relief to see her joke around.

This and That!

I just wanted to attempt to get over the block and make a hodge podge of doodling with words, more like catching all the stray thoughts and recording them.

My short story Puzzler is left there to linger without a completion - Believe me, I am working on it day and night - in my head. I feel that it is running more descriptive like a novel, so hoping to get it back on the short story track by chopping off the detail and dialogue. I shall most likely start off a part 2 in a different since the tone of narration is going to change.

I feel that I am currently a bonded slave - to my smart phone. Ever since the mobile technology kicked in, my dear husband tried to persuade me to maintain a cell phone. After numerous numbers and futile attempts to make me charge the phone on time or make me answer it when it rings - he gave up. Until recently where he got me the latest iPhone - now I seem to be ubiquitous on FB, and is there anything like irritating with over promptness? I am probably guilty of it. I switch off my technology, struggling to set my body clock to the lost hour in the "Daylight saving" fiasco - but the little monster in white grunts like a hungry pig - alerting me every time I get an offline FB message or a mail update. What do you expect from a night owl just set on the reforming path of being an early bird? I promptly reach for the phone on my night stand, squint my way in the darkness through the emergency message of my friend asking me if I am free to join her for a lunch date 10- days from now:-) As much as I want to love it, I am at the verge of getting scarred for life. Now, does it help that I am semi addicted to "Delicious - Emily's true love" game app? Somehow, it reminds me of my farmville days where I used to obsess over the crop and fertilizer like they exist in real.

Amid all these time killers, I do manage to life a decent, productive life. My kitchen sports a new, sleek, professional series stand up mixer! ;) I am keeping busy with the cooking and for those of you who are following me for long and wondering what happened to my "no dirty dishes in the sink" resolve - I am glad to inform, that probably for the first time in my life, I kept a new year resolution past Valentine's day! :-)

I often cross paths with a veteran sports personality of 70s India - It just stuck me in my last meeting with him, that I wanted to do a "In conversation with" kind of a blog. I shall work it out for sure - This man is built so strong - the strength of his character shines through every word he utters. I am sure we can all benefit from his life's experiences and wisdom. I'll stop it here before I divulge too much info.

My art students are currently working with water colors - which made me realize that there is a strange satisfaction in messing up things around us to create harmony. It is a task that makes me shake my head in disbelief at the sheer courage of attempting to teach little ones the use of messy colors - but on a totally different note, I think I might emerge with a few ponders on life and probably some eye candy art work to share.

As always, to all the people who kindly accommodate my mediocrity into their lives by visiting my blog - I am greatly indebted. I am an ordinary person, living an ordinary life - but each click my blog gets, each pair of eyes that read what I say makes my life amusingly extra ordinary. For all the love, support and sheer tolerance to my work - here's a sincere thanks! :-)

I shall strive to be worthy of it ;-)

Ponder

When I was in 6th grade, I fought with a boy in my class - I cannot recollect what it exactly was, but in the fight, the boy said something rude to me. Now, fighting and getting upset were both rare occurrences for me so I remember what followed, in great detail. To show my condemn for how the guy behaved with me, I skipped eating my lunch. When my science teacher walked into the class post lunch break - someone broke the news to him that I was on a hunger strike. What my teacher told me that day stuck to me till this very moment. He walked to me and asked me a series of questions. I answered all of them and so he could gather who was at fault. The boy volunteered to come and apologize to me and all was about to be forgotten when my teacher told me - "If someone upsets you, why do you have to go hungry? You should have snatched that boy's lunch and eaten it so that he could go hungry!" His humor worked - I laughed out loud and so did every one around me. It was all one happy class of middle schoolers. I am sure he did not mean to tell me the 'eye for eye' philosophy but it probably was how I instantly lightened up after that, or the very fact that if one person hurts you, your hurting yourself will not help, dawned upon me that afternoon.

Often, we forget how to deal with our hurts. We brood in the sorrow and immerse ourselves in the wrong doings of others. We also pay way too much value and attention to what people think or say about us- be it approval or disapproval. If we'd all put aside the reactions of the world and do what makes us happy - if we come to that level of comfort with ourselves where we don't seek approval from other sources, we have arrived.
Last night, Leslie Blodgett, The CEO of Bare Escentuals, a makeup revolution that hit the USA with it's break through natural products put a status message on her FB page reacting to the message alerts she received form a shopping channel's community forum, dissecting her Stella McCartney dress, I just had to go to the website and see a video of her presentation just to see what was so scandalous about her dress - This 49 year old woman who looks no bigger than a size 2 and no older than 35, carried the figure hugging black and white number with great aplomb. She further went on urging her fans to tell her why they did rude remarks about her dress - if it was that she was too old to wear the dress or if it was too revealing. Actually, it was not any of those things at all - as a conservative dresser myself, I found Leslie's outfit very appropriate for a Beauty guru hawking her products on a renowned teleshop. This woman who had built on a 'non existent on the make up map' company making it a phenomenon with her Mineral mantra - to the extent of making Estee Lauder, MAC and other make up giants flatter her most sincerely by imitating her producrt philosophy, succumbed to the pressures of people who take it upon themselves to keep others grounded - so one can only imagine what such attacks do to lesser mortals . A couple of years ago, she'd sold BE to the Japanese giant Shiseido for a whooping 1.7 billion dollars. She is still the creative and business head bringing in her unique way of marketing and products to millions of loyal fans that are now expanding to all parts of the globe. This success personified woman, easily the most famous business women in the present day  make up arena succumbed to the hurtful words of a few haters or just cynics that exercise their prerogative of freedom of speech to put someone down. As I grew older, I'd learned one thing - or actually I should say, that by observing a friend of mine that always turned criticism and mean remarks made against her to ashes, I learned a very valuable lesson of life. She didn't fight, or argue or explain herself - instead, she just used to ignore what was being said to a point where I wondered if she had hearing impairment. Most people around us rub us the wrong way because they get sadistic pleasure to see us get hassled and react in a defensive way. When we keep quiet, it rains on their parade of ridicule. As a young adult, I heard my father's cousin say it once - that "Ignoring is the biggest insult"

I look back upon my own insult and criticism handling history and I must say, I do the occasional succumb to them like most human beings do - but, there were instances when I'd shut up the meanest of them with one weapon - silence. I reflect upon my middle school teacher's wisdom on handling bullies - there are two ways, the one that requires some elbow grease in the form of retaliatory action or the other, effective, fool proof and peaceful way - Silence. When we don't cry - it is not fun for them to keep at the attempts to make us cry. Keeping a straight face when faced with such situations in life is the best policy of all.