Friday, September 28, 2018

Semusing #28 - Experience

Reward. A great motivator. Every time I ask my daughter to complete her chores or homework she'd quickly ask me "What's my reward?" I roll my eyes and say "Your reward is doing them."

I'll not get into the sitcomish verbal war I get into with her but the last time I gave her that answer, I made an internal pause. Doing something is our reward? How did I mean it? And if I had said it to my preteen, I better justify it for myself I thought and suddenly I started making a laundry list of all things I did and what I got as a reward and though this would make for a good musing.

When I was twelve, I had to change schools - I was suddenly shifted to a regional medium of instruction from my convent school. I didn't give it too much of a thought then, and I did okay in the transition. When I look back, I see that, the change I had to undergo was the best thing that could have happened to me at that point in time. I faced a huge challenge, I struggled to make drastic shifts in my learning methods but at the end, I emerged as very versatile. Almost like one of a kind.

When I was seventeen, I was fortunate enough to have gotten a government Job.  In the late 90s when being employed by the government was a goal many people sough to achieve, I was there, fresh out of high school, drawing the salary of a grown up with the security and perks a central govt job had to offer. Many of my peers went to do their professional studies, some of them stopped back to opine that seventeen was a time to enjoy and study. I did enjoy, I did study too - through correspondence all while doing some real time learning of the world.

A few years ago, I went through a personal ordeal. A loss that I'd probably gather the fortitude to talk about on a public platform one day. There wasn't anything anyone could do to save us from it and I had to endure it as God's will, to the best I could, with the help of my significant other and my supportive family and friends. This event taught me to be grateful. Ironically, an incident that should have broken me, taught me to pause, look around and appreciate what all I have and all the support, backing and love I got in the process.

When I saw my MIL go through a terminal illness, I saw first hand, the power of impermanence, of mortality - of how fragile and short lived human life is. My MIL endured so much pain with an iron clad smile. I never caught her sulking, cranky or complaining. Watching her at close quarters was an experience that put a lot of things in perspective for me. She had been a tremendous influence on me. She rocked her life in all the choices she made while she lived - both in the peaks of fortune and the depths of bad times.

In the past year, I experienced divine grace upon me - some in the form of the most wonderful of events and some on the other side of the spectrum. I somehow, in the process of living all this life, gathered the insight to greet each of my experiences without sorting them into good and bad, they are here to teach me something. They are hear to make me experience something. And then to process those experiences and update my wisdom.

I think what ever experiences we are put through are hand picked, tailor made for us. Only if we cultivate the patience to step back and examine each of them as a experience catering to our evolution - as experiences that make our journey on this earth worth the while.

I know the answer now. I guess. If we make sure  each assorted experience that we are encountered with is embraced with grace, and with an intent to learn, we have arrived! Big time!


Here's to Experience - the biggest reward of all.

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