My Friend Ms.Madhavan

There are numerous people that walk into our days and sometimes into our lives, hearts and minds as well. This concept of unrelated, random folks adorning our mind's mantels like glowing candles, spreading fragrance and light always intrigued me to no end. I am this fortunate soul that way, to have crossed paths with some people in my life, who, enhance my very existence with their presence and love. Ms. Madhavan is the latest and 'most missed' on my list right now.
I can recollect the day I first saw her - in the line to Aarti's pre K classroom. She spoke animatedly to a fellow Malayalee mom, uttering alien words in a sing song tone. It took me sometime to figure out that they were conversing in Malayalam, a South Indian language that I got mixed up with Tamil. Yeah, it is kind of silly, since being a Southie myself, I should have guessed! So, this lady was holding her son in one hand, addressing him as "Kanna" every now and then and crooning in the same sing song language. Her tallness added a mysterious grace to her persona. Wide expressive eyes, lush, curly tresses left open casually, a painter's nose and a perfectly chiseled figure that defied  motherhood summed up Ms. Madhavan - an eye candy of a woman. The first thing that registered in my mind was her beauty. Being the 'starting troubled" I am, I didn't really attempt to converse with her until we were a few weeks into the Pre K program. She didn't talk much anyway - just smiled with wide eyes and a preoccupied expression every time our eyes met. My mind created a stereotype - "a pretty young mom, probably small towner, not much exposure to the world around her" and during our few conversations, I also slotted her as naive, quiet and slow to react.

     Many a time we hear from all wise sources that we should refrain from slotting people into stereotypes based on some random experiences, and Ms. Madhavan did reinstate that same lesson deep into my heart. Probably because I was destined to learn a thing or two about life, or probably because our destinies interwove into one another, her kid and mine ended up in the same room for their first school year after being classmates for two years of pre k. Slowly and steadily, our association bloomed, from conversations about school and after school activities in general and about parents and family in particular. I saw more and more of her and every little meeting got me closer to knowing the person behind that naive expression and pretty face. She used to sum up philosophies of life in simple sentences, quoting them in her own plain words - words that spoke of universal truths in palatable bits and pieces. Random mentions about Oprah Winfrey show et al, quotes from famous women authors and little surprises like that made her a very endearing, sensible and hearty company. Her sing song voice and her strong Malayalee accent that doused every bit of English she spoke was music to ears. Never into the territory of gossip, always looking out and worrying for others and taking up little tasks assigned to her very seriously and diligently were real icing on top for a darling of a woman. I am blessed to have crossed paths with many friends who taught me lessons of life, but Ms. Madhavan's association took a special place in my heart - her very many conversations, her oversensitiveness to certain things, the way she tried to humor me when I was in a bad mood - all made a lasting impression on my heart's canvas. And the biggest of googlies was her immaculate sense of humor. A little talk to her lightened up daily challenges and put things in perspective. We have both belonged to different lands, spoke different languages and were brought up entirely differently but the common ground I share with Ms.Madhavan is of great reverence to me and I thank all my lucky star alignment that led me to cross paths with her. She shall for ever remain my beloved "weather reporter" and that bright sunshine in the garden of friendship.


     

He looks away,
The taciturn,
Answering the many questions
Rising in her probing gaze,
That way!
Dousing feelings in mute, dumb moments,
Freezing in the frostbite of inexpression
Crunching words into a powder of silence!
Unsaid, untold tales of love
Thus get buried
Under the tombstone of deathly muteness
The epitaph reading
Hushed emotions
Shut up into wordless,lifeless slab
Of concrete quietness!

Verse

The story to be told,
Dwells in the soul
Spreading dim light
In the premises of the heart,
Reminiscent of  a painful memory!

The story, that was felt,
Thrives in the tears
Spreads through the years
Singing lofty songs,
Of grief and hurt!

The story that unfolds
Tells tales of turmoil,
Tarnished hopes,
Tragic endings,
Trampled sprouts -
Terminated in the womb.

The story that sobs
Throbbing on the chests
Of the female form
While nipping many buds
For the fault lies in the forms they have taken!

Or may be, it is a blunder
In a man's world,
To be born as a
Life giving mother
To those very murderers!

Verse

Come to rescue,
Oh abstract verse,
When writing becomes a chore
Creating becomes a task!
Feigning poems,
In awkwardly chopped
Sloppy heaps
Makes the soul alive and buzzing!
The mind asks,
"What do you need"?
An unblock, an inspiration, a reason -
If nothing comes by,
Just a fusion of random words,
Words that bloom like weeds,
Spread like moss
In the garden of thoughts!

Verse

Words strung into meaningless
Motiveless chains,
Words that clog the crevices of brains,
That struggle to escape
And emerge into sense,
words choking with emotion.
Expressionless words,
Wandering around to find a goal -
To articulate the heart's many cares
Words woven into nets,
To catch the many tears and fears,
Poking out of the abyss of soul
Words - Idle, foolish, fragile
Escape the tangled thoughts
Engulfing a senseless verse!

Verse.

The touch on skin,
Cleansing, creating clarity!
The touch that generates
Ripples of fragrance,
A halo of perfume,
That of an Orchid ;
A jasmine, or wild rose.
The touch that cushions
With a luxurious feel!
A touch that glides
Adding to beauty!
A touch that awakens the senses
Adds pizzazz to every mood.
How she misses
Your sensual touch,
Oh scented bar soap!
The skin sensitivity be damned :D

Verse

Aloneness, amid a bedlam of voices,
Smothered with the confusion of choices!
To smile - or to frown?
At this loneliness full blown!
Conscience dissecting the simplest of deeds,
Giving them a Karmic twist.
Every harsh action and word,
Emerging out of the isolation,
Redefining the perimeter
Of the heart's quarantine!
Lovelessness distorting
The many crevices of thoughts -
Your silence, your ignorance
Like slow poison
Inflict upon the lifeless heart
Many a brutal wound!
Let it reshape the very psyche -
This want to be wanted
Ah, how tangled,
In your hopeless love!

Adornments

She looks around,
The circles of sparkles -
Stacked neatly on her dainty wrist.
The henna stained palms
Forming a stark contrast
On her tender skin.
Delicate little rings,
Tracing the diameter
Of her long fingers.
Robust nail buds
In the color of health
Tipping them.
The hand knit fringe
Of her flowing dress,
Accenting the grace
Of her arms.
What looks good on my hands?
She wonders,
Twisting them in the air -
Like a ballet dancer!
"Mine"
He whispers,
Grabbing her wrist!

Happiness

Pitter patter rain drops
On my window pane,
Red, white swirls
Of candy cane,
Chocolate covered raisins,
Dainty finger rings,
Smell of wet earth,
Memories that are worth!
Watching cattle happily grazing
Above the hill,
On a lush expanse.
A peppy number
To sing and dance
Smiles around,
Thoughts profound!
Sparkly polish on my nails,
Choo, choo train
Travelling on  rails!
Company of dear ones,
F R I E N D S reruns,
Book to take me
In the middle of no where,
Painting, creating, killing time
Trying hard to feign a rhyme!
Words bring joy
Like nothing else,
Reading, writing, speaking as well!
Whipping up yum,
Meeting new folks,
A chilled can of Coke,
Dresses with a yoke!
Shiny little trinkets,
Though I am dated -
Kind deeds, loving buddies.
Of all the things that make me glad -
One thing reigns high above!
Nothing tangible,
But only felt -
Deep in the heart,
My cares just melt!
On your tender lips a blooming smile -
That's what makes my life worthwhile!

Withdrawals etcetera

If it is amusing that I got used to blogging on a daily basis, thanks to A-Z challenge and the little one Arpna, it is utterly amusing to experience the withdrawals like I'd been on some substance abuse ;-) So, just in desperation to keep at it as long as I have the will and the desire, I tread back into my cocoon, weaving more threads of verbal repose.
Sometimes, I sit and wonder what the purpose of life is, when we all perish one day - we take birth, grow, literally and figuratively, we accumulate wealth and knowledge, toil amid all challenges and negative emotions, and one day, we leave our body - just an other belonging, like our home, or family and our stuff - Our body! The way we address it just, ever so subtly, reinstates the fact that we are not our body. Okay, may be this would get too wet blankety, my ponder - but on a positive note - amid all this mad rush of living, I think God created us to enjoy the rest of his creations - thrive in the beauty of his nature, nurture our souls in the many positive aspects of life like loving, giving and sharing - and to realize how lucky we are to be humans that can think, act and create just like Mini mes of our Heavenly Father.

On a slightly different note, I want to confess that little things comprise of my big things. I am probably the one who is easily pleased - throw a smile my way, or just a simple gesture - I feel eternally grateful, radiantly alive and deeply moved. Also, things that show love, that are done with care and affection - be it little paper flowers, or Wonder of the world monuments all display the divine quality of love like nothing else. We shall all pass - but the truly blessed are the ones that leave behind legacies that live, and love that blossoms in the garden of many a heart! :-)

Day 26 - Z for Zee, Z for Zed!

Zoom - the challenge went past. It is a bitter sweet feeling to write the last entry of the series. I wanted to come up with the usual assortment of Z words. Aarti asked me last night as to what word we have to blog on today. Usually, I ask her to list the words she knows on each alphabet. She promptly listed a couple of words she knew - Zebra and then Zoop, which she obviously made up. And after a while she said - "You should blog about Zucchini" :-D


So, Z entry it is today. A few years ago, I was visiting a temple in the east coast. While removing my shoes, I over heard two little boys discussing the discomfort of being raised by first generation immigrants. "You know what the worst thing is?" one of them questioned the other - "When they say Zed for Zee" They both made a disgusting face while letting out a mockery of laughter! Zed is how I read it in my first eye exam in the united states - but before I stray too much into how it needs to be pronounced, I'll talk about a few Zs that fascinate me.


Zebra is a master piece of God I think - for the way He arranged the black and white and for the lovely asymmetrical stripes they sport. I was so fascinated by the pattern, that I had to have a zebra patterned leather tote bag trimmed in red the moment I spotted it in the locked showcases of Macy*s.


Zoya is a brand of nail polish (if you aren't aware of it already) that has a zillion polishes in every hue and every finish all named after women/ girls. I love that the company boasts of its all natural formulation and am endlessly charmed by their ability to churn out lovely colors.


Z is for Zenith - the point I feel I am at today, after the successful completion of the A-Z blog. This really broke my block into fine powder. Though, I cannot really say they are of a great quality, I am proud of the fact that this challenge kept me on the go, diverting my energies and attention to something creative, though mediocre. 


Finally, Z is for Zen - what is the image that conjures up to your mind when you think of Zen? To me, it always is a visual with glowing candle light amid earth toned surroundings, a soothing fountain and some bamboo motif all tied together with a meditative texture and quality.The word ‘Zen’ is the Japanese attempt at pronouncing the Chinese word ‘Chan’, which in turn is the Chinese attempt at pronouncing the Sanskrit word ‘Dhyana’, which translates as ‘meditation’. Zen teaches us the simplicity of focusing in the moment - since past is bygone and future is a mystery - the present, the very moment we live in, is the one that belongs to us.  Zen imparts that very fine art of living, in the moment, in day tight compartments - belonging where we are, enjoying the time we are in without too much focus on what had been or what would be - Imagine, the tranquility that would dawn upon each of us when we master the art of living in the moment, relishing it and absorbing it like a blessing, a gift bestowed upon us from the high heavens.


In conclusion, this has been the most eventful happening of my year so far - the A to Z challenge, like I said before - it opened up my world, my thoughts and my ideas to avenues that I hadn't know to be existing. 


Now, the real challenge is to keep up with the challenge of blogging when there is no challenge to obligate you. But may be, just may be - the conscious effort to live in the moment might command the source of inspiration, eternally! :-)


Much thanks to Arpna Singh - the motivation and encouragement behind this lovely journey of alphabets.