Day 18 - R for Rolypoly's correspondence

(addressed to yours truly)


Dear one,

I hope this finds you in good cheer and pink health. I am not really concerned about your health much, except for the fact that your unladylike sneezes in the spring weather, especially when you loom over me, so close to comfort, amplify in my eardrums and cause much agony.(Now, You might not see my ears in and please don't look for them next time you encounter me) It is getting warm out there, and I hope to see more of you, or may be I don't. I am undecided. It is endearing and annoying at the same time that you don't seem to get over my speck of an existence when there are probably bigger and better things human species pursue with their time and energies. I am sorry if it so implied to you that you should find better things to do with you time than to carefully examine me every time you find a free moment and me on the side walk, coexisting, while you do your so called brisk walk! Oops again - I mean, how am I qualified to talk about brisk walk? while all I seem to do is amble around, aimless and lacking momentum. Now I am no steed like you probably know. But once I roll into that little pebble like form and you gently tick me back and forth, I probably move like a steed alright. Reckon? Or it is a far fetched misconception?

It gets funny when you try to focus on me, looking through the lens of your smart phone. You folks parade around with it like it is riveted to your hands - no judgement here - but I find it ever so slightly ego inflating when I see the intelligence that is built into me that doesn't run on an iOS or needs any downloading of apps or connections to the internet. I appreciate your looking intently at the walk way to dodge my brethren sharing the path and the lovely weather with you though, as we don't have a shield against being crushed. I know you are enamored by me and I have to confess that I feel a slight brush of jealousy when you look away when that more radiant ladybug lumbers by. She is pretty alright - shocking red, polka dots and all but I dare her to curl into a ball when disaster strikes. Geez - I address a human and I somehow start emoting like one. Pray when did feelings like jealousy creep into me? Let's stay clear of those useless shenanigans. They don't serve me much - all I need is the cue to self defense and voila, I am a complex intelligence manifesting into a beady little thing that amuses the likes of you to no end. Isn't that a worthwhile, accomplished existence? I know you'd whole heartedly agree. And do you notice? Once you leave me alone, I spread right back into action and go my way, without calling foul and trying to play out a doom and gloom sob story out of how you make my defense mechanism into a pastime. I feel this whole narrative we weave into everything that happens to us is the biggest disservice by us, onto ourselves. May be I conveyed it to you already without getting so elaborate, standing on my soapbox. So, gather what you may out of your endless fascination for me. I know you are the one that needs to write me some fan mail - but guess what? I am in a mood to give today. In a mood to please. I know you like letters and you like me. So what can be more pleasing to you than a letter from me? May be a letter from me with some sprinkles of wisdom and a lesson or two in living life? 
That, your species is in dire need of my dearie. Let them know as my message. I might be a meager critter, but when we are open to learning, we probably open portals into the most unlikely of sources. We coexist after all - and thank you for the attentive audience to my discourse. Tomorrow when you walk by, please tuck away that smart phone in your pocket and snort some nasal spray. You'll be more present and perhaps, you can pick a cue or two to live that life of yours better.

Much love dearie and see you soon.

Your partner on this path,
Mr.Rolypoly

Day 17 - Q for Quest

             

That sweet thing

He becomes the dance

To her rhythm.

The lyrics to her tunes.

She Measures her moves, cautious and careful

He sprinkles them in the air

Like confetti,

Spirited and care free.

His raw edges rub on to her polished surface

Shooting sparks like fireworks.

Poise personified,

Her grace is the stuff of story books

His ruggedness, like an art in mixed media

Dabbles on her restraint,

Bewitches her senses

Pulls her into his heart

Like the yang to the yin.

Them, probably poster children

For meant to be destiny!

So unlike but so aligned.

This cannot be an earthly transpiring

These souls blending in 

Like Sugar and spice, cheese and wine!

Sweetening, intoxicating

Fusing together

Merging into oneness

Seeking completion and finding it

In the pure embrace

Defining partnership

And inspiring tales

Narrated to warm hearts

And bloom smiles.

Day 16 - P for Poetic Injustice

Precious little petals of light

Luminous like Rudolph's nose

Swaying by my window sill

Staying company while I chill.

 They sparkle up my solitude

While at my desk I elude

The many mazes of this life,

Blooming joy and shooing strife.

Like the light at the end of the tunnel

Like the bliss of after life

They remind me this impermanence

As they bask by my wooden fence.

Shooting up for a little while

Parading their pretty smile

Now here, now gone

Mistresses of spring shining upon

This piddling life and middling lines.

As I applaud their perfect grace

As I string phrases in their praise
As I swoon and gasp, their beauty I grasp
Feeling clutched in their radiant clasp.

Pictured - The calla lillies that put up a show by my writing desk, playing my companions in my musings.

Day 15 - O for Only that!

She toils all day

Tending to a toddler -

The mom that she is, 

She has to rise to the occasion

And enable her children,

By proving her devotion

To the kids of her kids.

How does it matter if her old bones ache

Or her limbs scream for rest?

Other than that, 

It's all fine!

The perfect pair

The perfect house, perfect values

Hospitality

An urge to serve, to please, to nurture!

They sprinkle their love

To all and sundry!

The pitter-patter of little feet

Is all they miss.

Other than that,

It's just fine.

She wakes up like a soldier

Heading to a battle field.

Chemo sessions, radiation therapies

Care givers haggling over kitchen politics

Some see her for who she is

Some for what they'd miss when she is gone!
She smiles and endures the inevitable,

Facing her own mortality.

Other than that, 

It's totally fine.

He wears many hats

Son, friend, support

His parents' every mood swing

Is targeted toward him

Probably because there isn't anyone else

To tolerate them

Or because he is a soft spot that takes it lying down

To martyr himself in the name of love.

Other than that,

It's certainly fine.

He gets crushed, squeezed, smothered

Balancing the act.

A mom cannot be sidelined 

Nor can a spouse be undermined!

The women in his life fight over him

Or over their own yearning to win?

Masquerading in a smile

He lets them own, he lets them win

Slowly killing bit by bit

Of what is him.

Other than that, 

It's obviously fine.

Aren't pretty, delightful kids

The hallmark of a happy marriage?

Of course they are, 

The fruition of two souls merging

On a bodily level.

She gets up, dresses up, shows up 

He is blissfully absent

Physically, emotionally, spiritually!

But isn't enough enough?

A roof on the head, grub in the tummy

And don't forget the pretty delightful kids.

She cries herself to bed

Feeling lonely. Left out. Orphaned

As apathy vanquishes hate a million fold.

Other than that,

It's actually fine!

The kid has a convulsive fit

Induced by high fever.

Single mom, rushes to the ER

Comes home fazed! Unsure, shaken.

The kid sedate on medication

Drifts into sleep

As she knocks the neighbor's door

For support!

"May I ask you a favor?

I am scared and alone.

Would you mind staying with us tonight?"
The courteous, kindhearted neighbor agrees.

She lets a man into the house

A man that isn't hers!

Tomorrow he's gone, and she's alone with her fears.

Other than that

It's pretty fine!

Social butterfly. Hundreds of online friends

Ubiquitous on every hang out.

Opinionated, passionate, under control.

She makes a virtual world her reality

While swallowing happy pills.

Old, worn out, alone

In an empty nest!

The facetimes punctuate the voids

The love emojis mask the wounds.

Other than that

It's really fine!

Looking through the window,

Filtering her fears and longings

She keeps pacing the corridors

Italian marbled, carefully decorated corridors.

He might show up tonight

May be tomorrow 

Spent, wasted, perhaps lost

He seeks it outside the threshold

She lets him. The devout yin to the yang!
For loving too much is a thing

As is taking for granted!

Other than that

It's absolutely fine!

A little bit of this, 

A wee bit of that

A pain here, a betrayal there

A tear here a fear there

A deception here, a vacuum there

A loss here, a turmoil there

Amid all this rubble

Of little 'Only thats'

Life goes on

Cause other than that

It has no choice but to be

 fine.

Day 14 - N for Not your average Goat

My Saturday serendipity unfolded only and only because of the 'surrender experiment' thingie I was doing since the commencement of the Nineteenth year. To the uninitiated, it is a fancy term for saying yes to all opportunities that knock the door without doing too much contemplation.

We were out and about and I got into my loungers to do chores around the house when the significant other came with an idea to visit his friend."S says there are baby goats on the farm. Let's go with the toddler" My ears perked up at the sound of farm and baby goats and the next thing we knew was driving into this fabulous gated property that looked like it could be somewhere by the swiss country side. When we walked in we were greeted by S that was cleaning the fish pond. A school of robust looking koi fish clamored around with the cutest open pouts while the second born fed them. "There are some baby fish out there" came a voice from behind us, with the sweetest of accents. I turn around and meet K. She looked like a desi version of Lauren Hutton - defined face structure, chandelier earrings that grazed her slender shoulders and a pile of highlighted hair tumbling down her high cheekbones. She for once was going to redefine my new 'role model' of graceful ageing. If she weren't tending to the animals on the farm, she could as well be gliding on a ramp wearing some couture fashion,as she looked that supermodel part, yoga pants and a faded t shirt not withstanding.  

"Let's meet Chevy" the timbre in her voice was very soothing. "CHEVY" "CHEVY" she calls out and adds "It is so funny, she thinks I am her mom" 

Far across the picket fenced enclosure, we spot Chevy bleating her head off to be let out of the gate. She continues her high pitched cries while making a bee line to her momma - the human momma that is!

S and K tell us about the adventure behind Chevy's survival and how she was christened by a group of school kids that came visiting to witness her mom deliver the babies. "A wonderful lesson in nature" I thought. So for all practical purposes, Chevy behaved like a Canine in sheep's clothing. She wanted her momma's undivided attention, kept tugging on to her pants with her teeth and  gave a "Look she loves me more" attitude to the nervously barking house pet Stitch that was vying for his share of attention. The house pet in question was sporting a freshly manicured coat and a menacing expression that looked like he was willing to chew n spit out Chevy if He could. Only that his puny Yorkie size didn't probably co-operate. And what he lacked in stature he compensated with his lung capacity. 

Amid all this bedlam we moved to another enclosure to see a new born goat Sprout. Now, sprout was having latching issues and his mom was kind of easy about trying too much. As K held the baby to his mom's udder, his feeble mouth kept slipping off. K sprung into action. "Let's milk the mom and feed him with a bottle" she announced while walking to fetch a pail to milk into. S forbade K from spoiling the kid. K started milking the goat anyway. And right then, a thought occurred to me. " May I try milking the goat?" I asked unsure but determined to try. "Oh of course, but what about your white dress?, It'd get dirty squatting on the dirt" She was concerned. I for once wanted to be a farm girl. While mentally preparing to make a ER visit and not caring if my white clothing got dirty or bloody, I got to milking. I suddenly remembered how my sister thought that birthing the puppies of her pet was the most amazing experience she had in her life. Now that would be a hijack of this blog if I go in details, but I'd revisit that one day! (making a mental note) 

The udder felt like heat pads that I used to soothe my c section incision. I was taken aback by the wonders of this nature, I probably got misty too while in the background, my little one looked at the whole process with dilated eyes. "This is where milk comes from" S told my toddler - "And not from store shelves" It suddenly occurred to me that my second born addresses milk as "white juice" - that's some tricks I had to play to wean her off of nursing but back to the point, It occurred to me that no technology can probably teach the kids as much as nature does.

Very soon, we were back indoors, gathered in the living room and Chevy makes it inside much to the annoyance of Stitch who wasn't going to take it keeping mum. As I hear the story of Chevy, I think to myself that it makes up for a movie script. Apparently, Chevy's mom was kind of old and K was surprised that she was even carrying - she passed on in child birth and so did Chevy's twin. And a week after that Chevy's dad passes on. Talk about tragedy to Shakespearean levels. S and K looked more like sisters than friends as they related to us the way they bottle fed Chevy, bought her indoors trying to keep her warm and secure.
"We didn't think she would make it - and look at her now" S exclaimed. Chevy was one heck of a robust baby goat, drinking milk out of a saucer and eating off of her mom's fingers, fresh fruit bits like apple and kiwi - Stitch was non stop yapping all along and no one even seemed to care at this point! :)

We had a relaxed evening while I kept marveling at Sprout feeding out of the bottle. I held him in my arms and fed him. It was the most unexpected experience of my recent past - milking a goat, feeding a baby goat fruit bits and another one out of the bottle, cradling him in a blanket and holding him snug like he was a human baby!

The planet is such a wonderful playground - animals and humans co existing like soul mates, heart warming stories of love, pain survival and support and lessons teaching you the most important of life's tricks of the trade, only if we slowed down and made a connection. 

Such a wonderful playground - everyone needs to get out there and play once in a while. That would probably fix all ailments of the body, mind and spirit.

I came home late that night with my heart overflowing with gratitude for the serendipity, for the food for thought and for crossing paths with K the rock star and Chevy the Protagonist of my entry number 14 and a very important life lesson:) 

Pictured - Chevy nibbling an apple slice from under the dinner table. 

Apologies for the typos - proof reading is postponed due to time crunch :D

Day 13 - M for Monalisa Smile

May came into my life in the  month of May, in the 17th year in the millennia. Well, that sounds like a lot of Ms, not just one. May got many unique things into my radar like meaningful mean, meaningful silence and meaningful friendship. May be it is more than just something that can fit into the word 'friendship' though the word is enough if it represents what it truly represents. But May, being who he is, kicks it up a few notches the mean meter. May and I were supposed to be childhood friends. learning from the same teachers in the same classroom, preparing for the same exams crossing paths on the same road day and again. We were in different rooms for the better part. It didn't unfold that way - at least, not at that point in time but what is meant to be is meant to unfold. Sooner, or later. It happened later in our case when I went into my rapture of mining childhood memories (that tied me and May to the same school for a good decade of our lives, till one fine morning, I had to change schools)  in our virtual hangout where dozens of others from the same batch hung out with us. It took me no time to notice him and I hope vice versa as my soliloquy on the said virtual space was duly acknowledged by him more than anyone else. I don't know at what point it got to a one on one, but I am sure it was I that initiated it and boy was it one of the best things I did in that year!

May soon became the Jerry to my Tom, the Hobbes to my Calvin. He would appear every time I had a banter in tow, value adding sometimes or just pulling my leg and name calling me when ever the opportunity presented itself. There was an unmistakable comfort zone that established itself between us with no effort and I soon realized that we could have been twins sharing the same dna. As we are alike, we are different. May seldom talks. The first time we had a conversation, it was awkward. I didn't know if he was even on the line. He spoke in monosyllables. He dismissed me abruptly saying "I have to go" and the next thing you'd know is he's gone! He'd handpick the choicest of names for me. Some were utterly flattering and some deflated me like never before. He would call me a spell caster (That's probably a witch  and no, it is not a witch like Hermione Granger.) He had carefully picked memes of dragons spitting out fire, hook nosed, hatted witches flying on brooms and Joker making sinister expressions at me to convey his every unspoken sentiment. He had condescending humor for my every choice. From Matt Damon, to strawberry ice cream to my endless chatter about my spiritual quest. If I quoted Einstein, he would   counter it saying "Einstein never said that.' If I told him I saw these hundreds of cows in the dairy farm on the way to my early morning trek, he would say "They'll all be slaughtered, poor things". If I said Malcom Gladwell thought well he'd say Gladwell had no brains to think. When I begged him to send his mailing address so I could get him a hand written note for his birthday, he would ignore me like I am invisible. He used to subtly correct my spelling mistakes, which were one too many, specially when I typed without proofreading on that social media hangout. Torture much! Right? That's what I meant by 'meaningful mean' though it seems to be devoid of any meaning as of now.

When May and I met, we seldom spoke. He had a smile. Almost like a clueless idiot, smiling away into space. I have to say, that was his saving grace. At first, when he held the car door open everywhere we traveled together, I felt acknowledged and special. And then when he escorted me to my destination and arranged for commute that I didn't even ask anyone for, I felt protected, understood and treasured. His affection for me was brotherly. But then I thought the word 'brotherly' didn't do much of a justice. It was more motherly. And pray how all this was conveyed - in utter silence. To me,  he gave a new meaning to the adage "actions speak louder"

When I took my social media nirvana recently, the biggest fear I had was losing contact with May as he, being the silent sinister that he is, would never initiate a conversation if I go missing in action. I missed him and secretly prepared to let go of the association. I couldn't have been wrong. One day, after a few moths of me telling him I am going on a break, I hear my phone ring.
"I am calling child protection services on you" speaks the voice on the other side. "Who is this?" I ask. "Why do you ask when you know?" comes the sharp, no mincing words, idiosyncratic response. That would have been his record phone conversation - or perhaps phone audience. As I rattled away for a good one hour telling him time and again that I am in disbelief that he actually initiated a conversation. He wouldn't say anything in response. He would just listen. silently. without verbal cues. But even amid that silence, I sense the grin. I probably put that smile to his face and he puts a smile into my being that lingers around indefinitely.

May called me a lot of wonderful things but the love he showeres on me tops them all. He uses carefully chosen wordage but his little gestures surpass every word ever conjured up by human creativity. "Hello Monalisa Smile" I said one day and he went "Why did you say that?" "Just cause I felt that way" I told him - at this point, I didn't even see that saving grace smile. It was probably an intuitive moniker I gave him. "A colleague of mine used to call me Monalisa" he went.
I couldn't be more smiling at the coincidence. Or the several others that tied him to me - the way our names were related, the way we both love Dogs with special reference to German Shepherds, our awe for dinosaurs, the way we are crazy for books - though I am to catch up on his collection database or the way we both love children and Matt Damon - Well, he hates Damon but may be he doesn't! We'll work on injecting a little Damon love into him as time passes ;) May is probably one of those few associations in my life that defines unconditional love. There isn't anything he expects from me and there isn't anything I give him except perhaps giving a pounding headache with all the trivialities of my life that get yapped to him in an infinite loop. But what he gives me in return sums up why we come to the world - it is perhaps to experience this kind of human bonds. It is perhaps to have a glimpse of 'no strings attached, pure motherly love' that we arrive with our body garbs to endure an earthly journey.  I feel utterly blessed to have found this miracle in my life, of making a friend that pushes the boundaries of the already boundless word. I can be grateful all I can, but I can never be grateful enough for this meaningful meanness in my life. May Ur tribe increase May - and here's my little wordy gratitude. Please know that every time I count the most profound blessings of my life, I'll count you numerous times.