I started meditation a couple of years ago. One day, all of a sudden, I dropped everything I did and sat still for ten minutes. Now, I wasn't able to completely switch my mind off - it kept thinking its usual thoughts, plotting its usual plots - but I sat there, in a sincere attempt to unglue myself from my mind. The results were astounding. I mean, this is no tall claim. All it was was just ten minutes of silence, with the spine held straight. At the end of it, I felt like I passed through a quick flash and could sense a well being spread to my every nook and cranny like a gentle aroma.
It's been two years since, and the soap opera of the mind does do its rounds in the head corridors. I go with the flow, let it do what it has to do and I do what I have to - which is to identify myself as different form the mind rodent and gain an internal balance back. I fail sometimes. Miserably. But by and large, the anchor of these meditating practices does make a huge HUGE difference.
Not too long ago, there was a time when I called this blog as "Chronic Thinker Chronicles"
And when I explicitly labeled myself that, it goes without saying that it was a badge I was proud to wear. "Thinking" I thought, had defined me in the most profound way I could imagine. And then the new road, the new understanding, the new perspective! In a flash, I laughed at myself for the biggest delusion I was subjected to. Thus 'The Disillusioned" tag emerged.
It is funny how our minds are our commentators, our glasses through which we see the world. All the sensory perceptions are guided and guarded by the mind. 'My thought' 'My opinion' 'My perspective' 'My preference' 'My understanding' - It is all this mad frenzy to fit that Me into everything we see - And as a result, we torment and abuse ourselves. We create mental pain which creates physical disease.
So now, the ever learning moi knows where to park the mind - but the might the mind has is something else - it makes its existence felt no matter how hard I try. But I try. I don't give up - I listen to this pesky little voice, I play along sometimes but I know I am playing along. But one day, I'll make it stand there, on the other side of the line, never encroaching the real me that is inside, the one that doesn't need an I to feel empowered.
Its all right there, crystal clear, we even seem to know it in theory. Mind the mind. Don't let the mind mind you :)
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